All of them, those in power, and those who want the power, would pamper us, if we agreed to overlook their crookedness by wilfully restricting our activities.
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Some highlights of my childhood in the Sea Org in Los Angeles from 1972-1982:
My parents joined the Sea Org in 1972 when I was six years old. I remember my mom filling out my Sea Org contract, one of the questions was did I have any hobbies. I said I liked doing housework with my mom. I was brought to the Cadet Org and went to a public school. After school, I was supervised with a group of children. I saw my parents one day a week. I was never given a doctor’s checkup or taken to the dentist. Our living conditions were not sanitary. Many kids had lice and I remember a girl who had scabies.
Captain Bill Robertson came to the Cadet Org on a mission around 1973. At one point, he had all the kids line up for muster, and then had us yell “Hip, Hip, Hooray!” to L Ron Hubbard forty times, while we were photographed. The kids at the Cadet Org were always encouraged to “write letters to Ron.”
When I was seven or eight, I was given manual labor to do, such as cleaning toilets, scrubbing floors and washing dishes. I remember my mother being angry that they had children scrub toilets. She thought we could get a disease. I remember once when I was seven, my mom had to ask permission to take us from the Cadet Org to visit our dad at another location. She wasn’t given permission to take us, and as she sat angrily in the car, she shouted to no one in particular “This is insane!” I asked her, what does “insane” mean? She took us to visit our dad even though she didn’t have permission. When we got back we were assigned lower conditions for “blowing.” Funny, a seven year old kid, being assigned a condition of Treason and made to do “amends” which meant I was assigned to scrub the floor for a certain amount of hours. Someone tried to explain the conditions to me and help me through the steps of the conditions. I didn’t even know what the words meant.
They didn’t really put high quality people in charge of supervising the Sea Org children. I remember one man, named Fred, who used to terrorize us. He would shout “Revele, revele, roll-out!” and walk through our bedrooms to wake us up. If we didn’t jump out of bed immediately, he would rip the covers off and tip the mattress over. He would yell at us, push us, and pull our hair. He was a strong, angry man. It was rumored that he had sexually abused his daughters. One time he brought me and other children (about 15 kids) to the backyard of a Sea Org house on Beacon Street in Los Angeles. We had some supplies, such as rakes to clean up the yard. He told us to line up against the wall of the house, in order by height. He then picked up a brick and said, you are all going to clean up this yard, and if I catch anyone fooling around, I’m going to make you line up against this wall just like you are now, and I’m going to throw this brick at each one of your heads, starting with her (pointing to the smallest child.)
When the Sea Org children were living on Melrose Ave, we used to have a secret word that was yelled whenever a health inspector was coming to the building. I believe it was “Code One” it meant we all had to go in our rooms and shut the door. This was because the Health Inspector was told there weren’t any children living at the building.
I was taken out of public school while I was in the sixth grade. I got no further education. I joined the CMO when I was 12. I worked from 8:30 am to 11:00 pm, everyday of the week. I also had to participate in “all-hands” which meant working all night, then working the next day as well. I had very little free time. Occasionally I’d get half a day off on Sunday for “hygiene time” to do laundry and clean my room. Pay was about $5 to $20 a week. We were told we could have a day off once every other week if our stats were up. It was called “libs” for “liberty” (ironic, considering we had no freedom in the Sea Org). We used to joke around, as if we were quoting Patrick Henry, saying “Give me Liberty, or give me Hygiene time!” More often than not, something would come up and libs would be canceled. But, I felt good, I was “saving the world.” I was treated with respect by other Sea Org adults who thought I was such a cool kid for being in the Sea Org and working for the CMO.
I went to CMO Int when I was about 15 in 1980. I wasn’t told where I was going and had to sign a contract that I agreed to pay $50,000 if I ever told anyone where Int was. I told my parents I was going, but I didn’t know where it was or when I’d ever see them again. I was told that people who worked at Int couldn’t have children. I had to agree to not have children if I wanted to work there. The night I left for Int, I was driven there in a van with some other people.
At Int, I saw people being yelled at by David Miscavidge and others. I saw people woken up in the middle of the night and given “gang bang sec checks” where two or more people interrogate you while you’re holding the cans of the e-meter. They would ask embarrassing questions about sex and whether you were trying to hurt Scientology. They basically would try to get you to incriminate yourself so they could punish you. I think they had already decided they were going to bust someone, and they would just do this sec check to further intimate the person and get any information they could out of the person. The people were usually soon assigned to the Running Program, EPF or RPF.
At Int, I was a secretary to an executive, but although I had to be constantly on call for any request, she didn’t give me a lot to do. So I would sit in her office, waiting for her to give me an assignment. After several months, I was removed from my post. I don’t really know why. My supervisor yelled at me and accused me of being “slow.” I distinctly remember her saying that she could easily find some 12 year olds who could run circles around me. I remember thinking, cynically, “Sure you can, because 12 year olds don’t know anything and are easily manipulated.”
When I was removed from my post, I was given a “gang-bang sec check” by two people who led me to a small room, had me pick up the cans, and then angrily interrogated me, asking me if I wanted to have sex with David Miscavidge, among other embarrassing sexual questions. They also wanted to know if I had secrets or was trying to hurt Scientology execs. I replied “No” to all their questions, I was taken off my post and assigned to do manual labor. I was scared and angry. I knew deep down that the way they were treating people was wrong, but I still believed in Scientology.
I helped build the “Clipper ship” at Gold, worked on building renovations and was assigned to dig ditches for an orchard that was to be planted. I had calluses on my hand from the shovels, we didn’t have gloves. Our work schedule was ridiculous. It was literally 6:00am to midnight. We were given 5 hours to sleep. The lack of sleep was the hardest part. It was torture after awhile. Day after day with 5 hours sleep, all summer long. Some people used to sleep in the bathroom stalls or just lay on the bed in the sick room and sleep.
After several months of doing manual labor at Int, I was sent to the RPF in Los Angeles. Everyone on the RPF had to dress in dark blue clothes and run everywhere they went. We were not allowed to use the elevator, and had to address everyone as “sir.” We had to eat leftovers after the regular staff had eaten. We were assigned manual labor all day long. We had no rights and no time off. On the RPF, a guard would sit outside our bedrooms all night in case anyone on the RPF tried to run away during the night. I remember having doubts about Scientology, thinking that if Scientology took over the world, they would treat everyone this way. There would be no freedom of thought or expression.
You couldn’t even confide in a friend. I made the mistake of telling a friend on the RPF about my former supervisor, I told my friend my supervisor had been a real b****, and not long after I was assigned to the RPF’s RPF. It turns out my friend told someone what I said while she was getting sec checked or audited. I don’t blame her, we were all encouraged to report anything that was “harmful to Scientology.” I should have known better than to say anything critical to anyone.
So, I was assigned to the RPF’s RPF, when I was 16 years old. I was taken under guard to the boiler room and made to chip paint off the floor all day, while a guard sat in a chair and watched me. I was given 15 minutes to eat meals, and 6 hours to sleep. I was guarded day and night. I wasn’t allowed to talk to anyone. This went on for a few days, and then I was returned to the regular RPF. I felt numb.
While on the RPF I was put on the Running Program, and was on it over 200 days. I spent all day running around a red pole in Griffith Park while being supervised. The supervisor made sure I was running to “complete exhaustion” and I didn’t spend too much time resting on the bench. I could easily have faked a “win” and finished the Running Program, but at this point I believed in Scientology, and I wasn’t going to lie about having a win just to get off the Running Program. Even though it would have made my life easier to lie, I thought, if Scientology works, then I should have a win from this Running Program, and I’m not going to lie about one.
What finally helped me leave the Sea Org was my brother visiting me a couple of times while I was on the RPF and pointing out the many lies that Sea Org members are told. We are promised a day off, a vacation, that we would get paid, etc., etc. and then there are always reasons why we won’t get paid, can’t have our day off or have a vacation. The vacation promise was hilarious. There was a policy by LRH that every Sea Org member was entitled to a three week vacation every year. The catch was, you had to find someone to cover your post before you could leave. Of course, no one was available to cover for anyone, we were all too busy doing our own posts and trying to keep our stats up, so not many people ever took a vacation. Usually if someone was allowed to leave for a week or two, it was to go “handle” their relatives who were causing “bad pr.” The person would be drilled on how to talk to their relatives before they left, and they would be debriefed when they got back.
When I left the Sea Org, I had to sleep in my parent’s car. My parents were still in the Sea Org. I had nowhere to go, no possessions and no money, not even a high school diploma. I had been in the Sea Org for ten years. I was 16 years old, and I needed a job so I could support myself.
I’m just one of many people who were abused by the Cult of Scientology. This is what Tom Cruise endorses and donates millions of dollars to.